Losing a Loved One

Losing a Loved One

She Code Africa Nairobi's photo
She Code Africa Nairobi
·May 10, 2022·

3 min read

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I always saw people lose loved ones and after a week or two, they're back on their feet and ready to resume normal duties. Most of them were strong enough, and you could never see a tear.

They always seemed energetic and ready to move on, making it seem alright. In my mind, I always knew that it is so normal and easy to get back to normalcy after a tough occurrence.

As they say, the burden is never heavy when it is on someone's back compared to if it was on your back. Things are only clear to you when you encounter them firsthand.

This was my experience a few years ago. Having had a few friends lose their loved ones, it had never occurred to me that maybe someday I would be in their shoes.

I was so broken when the news about my dad's loss got to me. At first, I had no idea how I was supposed to react. I cried a bit, talked to people, told them how it had occurred, and welcomed visitors to our home.

I thought I would be ok, but late in the night, it hit me, and all I could do was wail for several hours. All went on, and he was laid to rest, and for a moment, I thought that was the end of the tears and much depression. To my surprise, it had all started.

The next few months were followed by fear at night. I would keep the lights on when sleeping, isolating myself from people as I wanted to always be alone and cry.

This went on for a long, but then something important hit me. It dawned on me that despite numerous efforts to reach out for help, the major help would come from within.

I then started a journey that I would say was beneficial. I took a journey of self-acceptance. A journey of managing my emotions and fighting to keep myself strong.

This was the major discovery I made. I realized that you could seek help but the major healing comes from within. Launch the strength from inside you and slowly by slowly things will work out.

It is a gradual process but very beneficial. I could now sleep with the lights off. I could talk to people without getting emotional, and I could remember him and not cry for hours like I used to. It gradually happened, and I am proud of the progress thus far.

It doesn't matter what's breaking you, take the initiative to launch energy from within. First, accept that it's happening and accept that you will not dwell there and be sad about it.

"No matter your situation today, the sun will still rise tomorrow and even the days after". Therefore, launch energy within you and you will make it.

-By Miss Cee

 
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